My baby is turning 3 tomorrow. Time is going by so fast. It's wierd how when things really suck, time seems to just kind of stop, and then when things are great...it just skips on past you and before you know it, your baby is 3. 3! 3!! 3!!! Not that i want my baby to be a baby anymore, because I am really enjoying this age...but it would be nice if she would just kind of pause for a minute and let me breath and take her in. I'm in love with her. More than any momma could ever be in love with a child. I remember clearly this time 3 years ago... I didn't want to go to sleep because I just KNEW we would be going to the hospital. I just knew it... and then...we got the call at 3 am! We rushed to pick up her birthmom and dad and drive them to the hospital. Andrew and I were beyond excited, and nervous and more than anything scared. Scared of the unknown...scared of what COULD happen, and scared for what we wanted to happen. We had wanted a baby for so long to make our marriage into the family we always dreamed of. We couldn't have been given a more perfect child for us. She is everything I would possibly want in a child. She has the best of both of us and I think we couldn't have created a more perfect child for us. We are blessed. My mom mentioned to me today how she feels that my cancer was a blessing. I'm not sure I would go as far as she did in describing my past year and cancer as a BLESSING, but she is right...there are things that have come to be because of my cancer. I have stopped to take things in. I have stepped back and decided what is really important. As much as I totally miss my old life...my old everything, I am enjoying the time with my daughter, being a MOM, a WIFE, an AUNT, a DAUGHTER, a SISTER, and really really really enjoying it. I love being me again...and better than that...an even BETTER me! (well...on the inside anyway! :)) I just wanted to make a quick post to let you know (if I do still have any readers :)... that I am living, loving life, doing fine and happy. Cancer wise...I have an appointment in 1 week for a port flush. Those monthly appointments really make the time fly. I've convinced myself that I am keeping my port until my next set of scans. I have this weird thing about jinxing myself and right now...keeping it puts me at ease. It is funny how I use to dread having my port accessed...mainly because it meant I was getting chemo, which sucked, but also it reminded me every time that I had CANCER... now it kind of reminds me that I don't have cancer... and it comforts me. Plus I'm a chicken and not ready to have it removed. So...enjoy the rest of your week. I'm going to love on my two year old for the last time tonight... and enjoy our fun day tomorrow of celebrating 3! We have a fabulous day planned! Today was a great day...and I'm sure tomorrow will be even better...CAKE, ICE CREAM and PRESENTS....who could ask for more???! :)